Rejection is part of this world system and almost inevitable. 

Everyone experiences it but learning to deal with it and work through it early might be helpful. 

As a young girl, I grew up feeling a little bit rejected because I was perceived as weird. I was a completely left handed girl, wearing braces on my teeth with gums that are beautifully dark and I wore glasses. ( proper geek mode eh?)

Sharing my experiences wasn’t  always easy and possible because I went to boarding school.

I learnt to come to grips with the fact that not every person is your person. You were not created to be in every circle. As a result of my fair share of childhood rejection, I learnt quickly that one shouldn’t linger in places where one is tolerated. People who genuinely love you will not do that. 

I have also had to counsel my child when she came home really bothered because she thought nobody wanted to play with her and the person she really wanted to play with was mean to her. I observed how this hurt her as she took it to heart.

So from my own childhood and parenting experiences this is the advice I’d give,  like a gave to the woman who asked me this question. 

a.) Create an environment where your child feels loved, safe and celebrated. Love doesn’t mean spoilt. But build an environment where your is child truly cared for, nurtured, looked after and his or her needs met. 

b.) Create an open door policy at home: 

Let you child know he or she can come to you and pour out their heart anytime. An environment where you’re not too busy to listen to them share their fears and worries. 

c.) Make your child understand what God thinks about them. Depending on their age, inculcate songs and visuals that drive this point home. Find scriptures that back this timeless truth up. For example: 

 “You are the one who put me together inside my mother’s body, and I praise you because of the wonderful way you created me. Everything you do is marvelous! Of this I have no doubt.”

Psalms 139:13-14 CEV

“How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered!”

Psalms 139:17 NLT

Our identities do not come from people and the view of our social groups of us. If we as parents can work at helping our children in developing character through their identity in Christ, then we would many of today’s problems sorted.

d.) Help your child understand that an ideal world would be a place where everyone is good natured and kind, not everyone is like that. He or she needs to understand this early. 

I also discovered that if the feeling of rejection lingers without it being dealt with by the word of God, a child tends to grow to become needy and the feeling to be wanted at all cost in any circle or environment sets in quickly and this is detrimental to self- image, self- worth and self-esteem. 

e.) Pray for child. Cover him or her and ask God to help them deeply understand how much they are loved and how how much worth they carry on God’s eyes. 

This is a topic dear to my heart and I hope it blesses you somehow. 

Much Love,



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Joy is a Parenting Leadership Coach. She is a mother to three children.  She runs, a community where she helps Christian parents develop key leadership capabilities as well as clear paths to all-around excellence for their children through intentional, transformational Parenting.

She enjoys teaching and mentoring, writing, singing, research, and travelling.

Joy is also an author. Copies of her book " DISCOVER TO GROW"can found here

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This post has 8 Comments

  1. It totally blessed me, I have had to step in a few times when my daughter expected so much from her friends and would come crying because someone at school wouldn’t play with truth be told a lot of times I struggled to help I wasn’t sure how to….

    But you were right I created a safe haven and a loving environment knowing that that is always there for her and covering her all the time.

    Thanks so much for this blog post.
    It truly blessed me.

    1. I am glad it blessed you Ife. Thank you for your comments.

      Children face these things everyday and the task of interpreting other people’s feelins towards them is really huge. We need to be really observant.

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