You’ve probably heard me say this.

Going to school every Monday morning in my house is like going camping. I look like the boys scout leader with bags, musical instruments and sports bags on my shoulders while my kids trudge along carrying one other kit or the other. We have most things ready the night before and because it is my children’s responsibility to find some of their things.

 I instruct them to gather rulers, trainers, water bottles etc and keep them where we can easily see them on Monday Morning.

However, a number of times one of them has forgotten a key part of her kit for school. She is super creative and loves all thing stationery. She is to stationery what I am to books. On two occasions she has forgotten her pencil case at home. This pencil case holds all her writing material needed for her work in school. The first and second time this happened, I dashed back home to get it and return it to her.

By the time it happened the third time, I told her I wasn’t going to get it and that she would have to figure out how to go about writing, drawing in art class without her precious pencil case. She almost cried her eyes out. But I made her understand that she was learning a lesson right there and afterwards she would be more responsible and mindful to keep all the tools she needed for a productive day at school.

I was not happy to see her cry on a Monday morning, which meant, her teacher would notice her usual smiley and cheerful student upset about something as she walked into class.

But I was not going to jump to her rescue this time. Her life didn’t depend on it, her character did. So I let the so called disaster happen so that she could develop something stronger.

As parents, we must catch ourselves sometimes. We unconsciously try to help our children out by coming to their rescue all the time.

We do them a disservice by doing this. There are times when rescuing them is absolutely necessary.
However, some other times, we only contribute to character blind spots which don’t get better as they grow up. Remember, they are one step closer to adulthood with every day that passes.

It also negatively impacts their creativity within certain situations. By going to their rescue all the time, we hamper the development of problem solving skills, resilience, and emotional intelligence.

Whatever the situation is like in your home, You will know when it is time to put your superhero cape on or just be a civilian 😁.

“It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves that will make them successful human beings.”
Ann Landers

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Joy is an Intentional Parenting coach. She is a mother to three children.  She runs arrowsnarchers.com, a community where she helps Christian parents create clear paths to all-around excellence for their children through intentional, transformational Parenting.

She enjoys teaching and mentoring, writing, singing, research, and travelling.

Joy is also an author. Copies of her book " DISCOVER TO GROW"can found here

Connect with her on Facebook.

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