• Have you ever reached for something?
  • How high did you have to reach?
  • Do you think you reached too high?
  • Did you eventually reach it? 

Sometimes we do not reach our goals nor do we see our dreams materialise because of the fear of the unknown or better still the fear of being unprotected outside our bubbles and comfort zones. It seems like we are unable to survive outside our regular, known and comfortable environment so we begin to reshape and readjust our dreams and goals. We begin to rationalise reasons for not achieving what we initially set out to do. Especially when they seem too big or when they are not common occurrences within our circles.
The thing that is really worrying, though, is that we bestow that fear on the people closest to us. As we trim down our dreams, our dear ones become influenced by this behaviour and mindset because we contribute to helping them reduce the size of their dreams. Our children are the ones who bear the brunt of our experiences from never reaching our goals or achieving our dreams. Children dream big and there is no limitation in their minds. God did not create anyone of us with limitations in our minds. Everything that God gave us was meant to grow, our minds, our brains, and relationships were meant to grow. But the minute we arrive on earth, we are taught the language of limitation and are exposed to restriction.

Don’t get me wrong, there is some protection in limiting certain things to certain stages of development in life but we end up constricting the most important parts of lives and we influence our children to do the same because we all learn to live in the world by observation. Most of our actions and decisions are informed by what we observed in our homes as children as well as our association with different people.
I’ll tell you a true story.
12years ago, it was lunch time at my place of work and I went down to get something to eat from the company’s restaurant. On my way, I stopped to say hello to one of the company’s front desk officers, a lovely middle aged woman. Let me call her Madam Susan. As we spoke about the day and our workload, a shiny, black land rover slid into one of the visitor’s parking bay (never mind what it looked like 12years ago).
I looked towards the car and said ‘’that’s a lovely car’’. That comment was not well received by Madam Susan.
She quickly retorted “Don’t admire such cars o, you don’t know the bad things that man did to get the car’’.

I was astounded. What had my admiration for a car had to do with the bad things someone else did? Now, Madam Susan had grown children and I wondered what kind of advice she would have offered on things like owning big businesses, dream homes, travelling abroad on holidays or going to the best schools. She did not know this man at all but had concluded within minutes that he was a bad man because of the kind of car he drove. I could not get over it. That is why I still remember that conversation till date.
Be the right kind of model for your child. Teach them not to settle for the small things regardless of where they are. Fill your homes with hope, great aspirations, a can-do attitude and action to achieve those dreams. Share some of your aspirations with your children and take them on the journey with you until you achieve it. Let them see the effort you put in, share one or two of your pain points with them but show them that you are not stopping until you reach your goal or see your dream materialise. You will not know how far this would go to help your children in life as they work towards different things until you begin to see their achievements and they say to you, ‘’you are my inspiration”.


In other news,

Have you been thinking of finding the right school for your child? Primary/Secondary/A ‘levels.
Are you considering what your options are and you are not sure which way to go?  
Could an independent/private school be one of your options?
Perhaps you have attempted the search but have been overwhelmed and unsure.
If you answered yes, let’s talk about it. I am opening only 7 spaces for free consultations for parents who have answered yes to these questions. Finding the right school for your child is not a process to be left to chance. It is one that we must decide to go on and commit to. Your children will thank you for it.
This consultation is normally worth £350.
At the end of the call, you will have clarity on the right choice of schools for your child and what your next steps might be.
I will be closing the application for this consultation on February  24, 2017, at 6 pm. After this date, I will be in touch with parents who have clearly demonstrated that they are keen on making this happen.

Apply here to get a free space on my calendar.

Warmest Wishes 



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Joy is a Parenting Leadership Coach. She is a mother to three children.  She runs arrowsnarchers.com, a community where she helps Christian parents develop key leadership capabilities as well as clear paths to all-around excellence for their children through intentional, transformational Parenting.

She enjoys teaching and mentoring, writing, singing, research, and travelling.

Joy is also an author. Copies of her book " DISCOVER TO GROW"can found here

Connect with her on Facebook.

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